I have been thinking a lot about marraige and dating lately. I went through a phase not long ago of simply wanting to be married and have children as soon as I could. Most of my sisters were married and young mothers and they have done such wonderful jobs. I just thought that it must be easy. I picked up a book that I had started a few months ago but never quite finished. The last few chapters were about marraige. After reading this, I realize that I have been looking at marraige and motherhood far too trivially. It is unlike any other relationship and both should be entered into reverently, soberly, and with much prayer. It is not an easy job. I have so much more respect for my sisters now. They put their roles as wives and mothers only below their roles as daughters of God. Just because they make it look easy, doesn't mean it is. The life of a wife and mother is full of sacrifice and unending commitment. I am young and a lifetime is a long time. I think I will enjoy my freedom for right now and trust that God will bring my husband in His perfect timing.

Just because my sisters were so lucky to find these amazing men that are their husbands at such young ages, doesn't mean that I need to find mine right now. I feel that in my rush to not be single anymore, I was lowering my standards. In my mind, I was settling. But after reading the poem below, I have realized that the man described in this poem, the one that is "all things a man should be" is not someone I will find by settling. And so, I will again make the vow to trust my God and wait for Him.

A Woman's Question by Lena Lathrop

Do you know you have asked for the costliest thing,
Ever made by the Hand above?
A woman's heart and a woman's life,
And a woman's wonderful love.

Do you know you have asked for this priceless thing,
As a child might ask for a toy?
Demanding what others have died to win,
With the reckless dash of a boy.

You have written my lesson of duty out,
Manlike, you have questioned me.
Now stand at the bars of my woman's soul,
Until I have questioned thee.

You require that your mutton shall always be hot,
Your socks and your shirts be whole;
I require that your heart be as true as God's stars,
And as pure as His heaven, your soul.

You require a cook for your mutton and beef,
I require a far greater thing.
A seamstress you're wanting for socks and shirts,
I look for a man and a king.

A king for the beautiful realm called Home,
And a man that his Maker God, could,
Look upon just as He did at the first,
And say, 'it is very good'.

I am fair and young but the rose may fade,
From this soft young cheek one day;
Will you love me amid the falling leaves,
As you did 'mong the blossoms of May?

Is your heart an ocean, strong and true,
I may launch my all on its tide?
A loving woman finds heaven or hell,
On the day she is made a bride.

I require all things that are grand and free,
All things that a man should be;
If you give this all, I would stake my life,
To be all you demand of me.

If you cannot be this, a laundress and cook,
You can hire and little to pay;
But a woman's heart and a woman's life
Are not to be won that way.




To my sisters: A huge reason why I wanted to get married and have kids so early was because of you. I saw how amazing you guys are and how wonderful your lives are and I look up to all of you so much. But I just recently realized how sacrificial your lives are, and I look up to you even more. You guys are such great examples of wives and mothers that it is hard to not want to be just like you. I guess in some ways, I still am that five year old who wants to be just like her big sister, but with good reason :)